We all get complacent sometimes. We have comfort zones. We do the things we enjoy, that feel good, that come easily. That's why many people surround themselves with people who agree with them, think like them, and support them.
Many mangers, and many companies, fail because they rely too heavily on the people like them and screen out those who disagree with them. One of the key management failure is curbing dissent.
It Starts At The TopIt is the leader's job to provide the vision for the group. A good executive must have a dream and the ability to get the company to support that dream. But it is not enough to merely have the dream. The leader must also provide the framework by which the people in the organization can help achieve the dream. This is called company culture.
When your company culture allows people to challenge ideas, suggestions, and plans, you create an organization of thinking, committed people capable of producing the kind of innovation and productivity required to succeed today. However, if your company culture does not allowed dissent, if people who suggest alternatives are castigated for not being "team players", you produce an environment of fear, stagnation, and antipathy. Not allowing appropriate dissent will kill your company.
Discuss and Debate - Up To A PointYou're smart manager. You encourage your people to challenge you and suggest alternatives. But are you a good subordinate? Do you challenge your boss? Or do you sit back and protect your job by agreeing with everything the boss suggests? Such agreeing won't protect your job, at least not for long.
Every manager has a boss. It is our responsibility to our bosses to be honest with them, to tell them what we really think, even if we disagree. Especially if we disagree. You, and everyone of your peers, need to discuss issues openly, frankly, and with the best interests of your area clearly visible. You need to give the boss as much information and as many options as possible. Don't be afraid to fight hard for what you believe to be right. Be professional about it, but be candid too.
However, once the boss has made a decision, the discussion and arguing and dissent must stop. Once the decision has been made you have an obligation to support your boss in that decision. You expect it of your people; you should do no less.
Disagree Without Being DisagreeableYou think your position is right. You want what is best for your people. You want things done in the way that works best for your department. So you argue your points strongly. That's good, but don't overdo it. You won't win every battle. After all, your boss is looking after the best interest of his or her entire organization, not just your part of it. Recognize the aspects of negotiation involved. Remember you will be working with these people again in the future. For those reasons it's important that you "disagree without being disagreeable".
Dr. Suzette Elgin, an expert in psycholinguistics, wrote the definitive book, "How to Disagree Without Being Disagreeable: Getting Your Point Across With the Gentle Art of Verbal Self-Defense". The next time you have to give someone a bad performance evaluation or a co-worker verbally attacks you in a meeting you will wish you had read this book of practical, real-life techniques.
There are many other resources on the Internet. Here are two more:
- Fast Company calls this their Starter Kit on Managing Disagreements.
Using Mark Twain humor and common sense, they suggest ways to deal with the most common types of disagreeable people.
- Disagreeing Without Being Disagreeable
Professional trainers Anne Baber and Lynne Waymon, writing for "The Industrial Physicist", recommend these conflict-solving steps to help you "become as proficient at resolving people problems as you are at finding technical solutions."